Oh - so lovely. I got caught up in the middle of it. (Wait, what...RL still goes on?)
Over all smooth flow. There were choppy bits, but the choppy bits were exactly where they needed to be to help feel what the character(s) was feeling. :) Fantastic!
All characters were in character. :D I like how Sanzo figured out how to get the explanation to Goku – without having to do it himself AND a bit of revenge for being woken up!
Outside environment (cold, snow, fire) was described well - not so much detail it became distracting, but set the scene perfectly.
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carisma_sensei
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Date: 2009-11-25 02:52 am (UTC)Over all smooth flow. There were choppy bits, but the choppy bits were exactly where they needed to be to help feel what the character(s) was feeling. :) Fantastic!
All characters were in character. :D I like how Sanzo figured out how to get the explanation to Goku – without having to do it himself AND a bit of revenge for being woken up!
Outside environment (cold, snow, fire) was described well - not so much detail it became distracting, but set the scene perfectly.
Um...all that said, well done! AND!!!! THANK YOU!